I went to a songwriting retreat this weekend and am blown away by all the talented people I got to meet. I definitely felt like I was in over my head.
But something strange kept happening when we played our songs for each other on the last night. (It turned into such an awesome jam session. It’s a miracle the cops didn’t show up.)
Half of these super talented artists were visibly nervous before they started performing.
We’d been gushing over each other’s talent all weekend. Every side conversation included, “Can you believe how amazing so and so’s voice is?”
Yet there we were, in that tense moment before you launch into a song. Feeling like everything is going to go wrong.
Why is it so hard to believe people when they say you are good?
What if they are not “just being nice”.
It’s actually pretty messed up to think people are lying to you just to be nice.
That happens sometimes for sure.
But more often than not, people do not go out of their way to compliment and encourage you unless they mean it.
What would happen if you decided to believe the compliments?
What would happen if you decided to accept the support?
Enjoy the applause.
What would happen?
- You would have to believe in yourself.
- You would have to show up every day and do the work.
- You would have to put your vulnerability on display.
And there will be assholes. Choose not to believe them.
Dealing with feedback is something I need to add to my practice routine.
- Ignore the negativity.
- Accept the criticism.
- Believe the praise.
Until now, my habit has been to believe the negativity and ignore the praise.
What we do with negativity, criticism and praise can be a choice.
Or it can be automatic.
Let’s make it a choice.